Heart of Arts 2013

Heart of Arts is my favorite event of the year. It's always so much fun, and it's truly humbling to remember how much love and support Royal Stage genuinely has. It has been a crazy year. We've had growth, we've been interviewed by magazines, newspapers, TV shows, etc. for the first time and it's been difficult to live in the moment when you want your moments to become bigger and better all the time. That's why i LOVE Heart of Arts night - it gets back to basics, reminds me why we do this - reminds me of our awesome God.

Way too tired to put these in any sort of chronological order, but THANK YOU Krista and Jess for taking them! 

                                          Introducing the show - my least favorite role as director!

                                     Brandi made the coolest centerpieces - gold painted branches with feathers and flowers....just so pretty!

 

It was fun to get a little stage time in. It's been awhile. 

 

                                          I'm on a lace kick right now - thank you Pinterest.

 "I Dreamed a Dream." I told Lisa it would be more impactful if she cut off her hair and pulled a tooth out onstage.....but fortunately the song was gorgeous without the "full Fantine" ;)

                                                   My sweet boy with sweet Krista

                                Little Audrey. Her oldest sister went through our ministry and is so beautiful and grown up now. I see so much of Johanna in Audrey!

                                                         Good job talking into the mic, Sam :)

                                               Charlotte with her nana <3 br="">

                                          Worship the Lord like little children....

                                                    Someday the stage will be hers <3 nbsp="" p="">

                                          So thankful for the incredible crowd we had!

                                                       Cute little freak!

I just loved the diversity of the night. It felt as if my whole life were in a single room. Frank's family came, including his darling aunt and uncle from Lodi. One of my favorite pastor's wives was there....and speaking of church....our new church filled two tables with people! It was such an honor to have them come out and support. Someone told me they were always the first to clap and cheer - we are so blessed to have this new family of godly men and women in our lives. I'm so excited for the future!

So then there was the boyfriend of a good college friend who submitted for the art gallery, two other close college friends that were in the audience, my very best friend who drove up from Santa Clara just to see the show and go back home again (!), tons of RS "alumni" serving, supporting, etc. Incredible dance moms picking up all the little things I forgot throughout the day.....such a gorgeous fusion of people.

You are so good to us, Lord.








Oh and P.S.....tonight I spotted our billboard! Clear Channel rocks my socks for giving us such an awesome sponsorship!

Parenting Fail #850390985

Yesterday I surprised both kids with a Valentine's balloon. Sam's was a mylar brown bear holding a heart, and he kind of loved it. He tried to take said bear to CBS, and to the store, and even into the bathtub. He couldn't bear to be away from his bear ;)

This morning as we were leaving for preschool, he carried his balloon outside as I was loading up the car. I quickly told him that I told him if he did that and happened to let go, then it would fly away forever. Of course, he said "no it won't" - because everything is an argument these days - and I assured him again that it would.

Not five minutes later he had marched out the front door again and released the string. Within seconds it was out of reach so I made a big deal quickly saying "bye balloon! Have a nice trip!!!!" The kids both waved and shouted bye and were so happy for the bear's freedom - but then Sam asked when it was coming back. I reminded him what I had said about what would happen if he let go.

He got totally panicked and wanted to know what would happen to his bear. I didn't  want to tell him that it will burn up in the atmosphere so I stupidly told him it was going to heaven.

To which he responded "oh good! Jesus loves me he will make sure it comes back to speckle way again!"

When I told him it likely wouldn't, he was devastated and had a good cry. All day long, he asked me why God wasn't planning on returning the stupid bear balloon. "He HAS to, Mommy. If we pray, He will!"

Great. In one fell swoop my child had lost his beloved helium-filled valentine and also his theological footing.

The balloon came up again hours later. I had to substitute the Royal Stage kids' acting class, which Sam is in, and during prayer time he asked for prayer for the bear.

Tonight, I thought our balloon drama was finally a distant memory, but a short while after tucking him in, I heard soft cries from his room. These turned into full out wails, in which I heard through the snot and tears, "Ohhhhh my balllooooooon!"

Oh. my. gosh.

So I go in, stroke his hair and tell him that it's totally going to be okay - there are many other balloons in his future. Which of course led him to thinking I was going to buy him another one - which I am tempted to do, but also realize the importance of natural consequence.

Sam didn't listen.
Sam lost his balloon.
Mommy does not replace it.

But it was one of the first times I recall Sam being genuinely sad. Over a dumb balloon. But still.

I've seen him pout or fit over things - but this was genuine grief for his little bear who had floated off to "be with Jesus" and out of sight of our front yard.

Here's the deep tie in for you - obviously Jesus is not going to be receiving a mylar bear tonight. But God knows exactly where the balloon floated off to.

How many times have we let go of something and given it to God, and then not trusted Him to take care of it? How many times have we gotten ourselves into an absolute pit of heartache over the loss of something that was never intended to be permanent? Are the premature losses in our life really premature - or do we just place too much permanence in them?

Poor Sam.
Poor bear.
And poor us for not trusting God more with our losses - because perhaps if we did, there would be so much more to gain.

Good Morning

A Sweet Day

I love Valentine's Day. The world turns pink and it's a great holiday to eclipse the winter with flowers, warm dinners and perfect little packages. This is what I've loved this Valentine's Day:

God's gift to me = the kids slept until 7am!

Finding Frank had left a valentine for each of us on the dining room table - such a sweet little moment to wake up to :) I love that he bought Charlotte the fanciest card of them all - covered in princesses and glitter - she adored it.

Making hot pink chocolate chip pancakes for the kids. 

Helping Sam spell the names of all his wonderful CBS classmates and then watching both kids run toward the church with boxes of candy in hand for their incredibly teachers.

Seeing Sam's excitement as he showed me the valentines he had received, and the freedom from guilt as I let him eat conversation hearts. Sugar seems less destructive on holidays for some reason.

Meeting Frank for Japanese food for lunch - and watching the kids excitedly give him their homemade cards.

The late afternoon delivery of a dozen red roses from my wonderful, patient, long suffering husband.

The fact it's gorgeously sunny outside.

Spending a wonderful evening with our new church family tonight.

I like this day :) <3 br="">

More Than Halfway There!

I love February. Okay, I love all months with a holiday in them. I think that's why God picked my birthday for August - dead of summer, nothing happening - I NEED AN EVENT, PEOPLE!

Speaking of events, I checked our donation page, and I'm over halfway to the goal I set to raise $10,000 in 12 months for Royal Stage. Exciting!!! :) My God is so nice - thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has taken the time to donate. You have no idea how grateful I am!

My children also awkwardly thank you:

                                (It was windy).

We are having a big dinner show benefit on the 24th. If you can come, please do! We have a headlining act, lots of talent from Royal Stage performing, plus a yummy Italian dinner and art gallery. Ooh and raffle prizes. Yes!

If you can't come, will you please consider buying a "ticket" anyhow? Just a quick donation worth the ticket value ($20) would help cover expenses and would bless my socks off! And, if you're feeling exceptionally daring - make it a monthly contribution (gasp!)

It's so easy - you can do it blindfolded (though that isn't recommended, lest you accidentally donate $2000000 - but heck, that's fine with me).....

http://www.gofundme.com/kw8s4

SO. There is my February excitement!

Other things I love this month:
- Frank's birthday (where I annually attempt to surprise him with something but he always finds out)
- Valentine's Day! (this year with the added bonus of fondue with our new church family? yes plz!)
- There is pink everywhere! Thank you corporate America for dedicating yourself wholeheartedly to the world's greatest color. Shopping is just more fun when the world is in a cute blush.
- An excuse to eat cookies. (GIRL SCOUTS. I know where you're at!)

Please donate

http://www.gofundme.com/kw8s4

The Days are Long But the Years Are Short

Our sweet, beautiful, very funny little Valentines!

Little Bursts of Purpose

As I was driving the other day, there was a homeless man holding up a sign that said simply "HUNGRY." Homeless people are not uncommon around where we live - I usually drive past 4 or 5 on any given day as I drive from my house to Roseville. The down and outers form a little invisible divide between my home and everywhere I need to get to. We live on a street without any homeless people in sight, but close enough they're always on my mind. We've never seen a shooting on our street, but we know of many people who have - and more regularly lately we've heard gunshots as we sleep. I hate it.

They form a boundary line like a sign saying "You Are Now Entering Denial" whenever I try not to think about them. 

But, I love it. It reminds me to be grateful for how God protects our little family, and to remain aware of what's out there. That there's a need right in my own backyard.

I'll tell ya - from scheduling arts therapy classes for rescued prostitutes, teaching dance to a group of girls made up exclusively of those recovering from eating disorders, self-harm and sexual abuse, and working all winter with a whole crew of children who live off of food stamps and government housing....the reminders of the need become overwhelming at times.

I feel guilty buying my daughter a new dress. I feel guilty taking my son out to a special lunch. We aren't rich, we don't function beyond our means, but like anyone in the 'burbs, we can afford to do nice things. I don't understand why God chose us to be ones allowed to do that. Sometimes it makes me angry. Sometimes it makes me cry. I work hard to have it always make me grateful.

I'm often impressed by the creativity of signs homeless people come up with. Between growing up near San Francisco and living in an um, colorful region of Sacramento, I've seen the gamut of creative, witty, snarky, silly, rude, touching cardboard signs. I am way way way far from "street", but I do have some pretty good sign stories.

Which is why the fact this guy simply wrote "HUNGRY." caught my attention.

Project 365. It's always in my head. I wish it would just go away sometimes. I just want to go home. Why do I have to always have Project 365 in my head?

I ask myself, and then reach into the side console of my car where I know I stashed a $1 bill. There's also a 10 and I didn't realize it. Impulsively, I grab the $10 and stick my hand out the window. HUNGRY comes over to the car and gets it. He looks at it like it's a mistake. "Oh my GOSH!" he shouts, and then gives it back so I can see.

I am not thrilled with this, people. That's my McFlurry money for times of emotional need. But when I keep my hand out and look into his eyes, I see that my ice cream fund can stand to suffer a little.

"I want you to know this is because of Jesus." I don't even realize the words coming out of my mouth. "I want you to know He loves you. He does. What's your name?"

We're at a stoplight so he hurriedly tells me it's Jeremy, and his wife Sheila is across the street - I see a woman bundled up in a sleeping bag. He thanks me and tells me they are going to go get lunch right now. I tell him again it's all about Jesus, okay?

Who knows if he heard me. But I did get a glimpse of him running over to his wife, and seeing how relieved and joyful they were.

Over ten stupid dollars.

There is so much I can do in this world that I just don't do. It's so silly, you know? We could ALL do so much more. I'm relieved for days I can do a little. Even if it won't count for much in the end. I hope I helped for just that day.

I saw Jeremy and Sheila again the other night, in the exact same spot. She was in the sleeping bag and he was sitting next to her. I am praying for another opportunity to see them. If I do, I want to stop and hang out with them. Like I have time for that - but whatever. The world can wait. Because it's people like this that are GOD'S world. And I like hanging out there.