June 4.

I remember exactly where I was on June 4 three years ago.

I remember exactly where I was in June several years ago, too. 

It seems rather unfair that a person's life should end twice, during the same month, for completely different reasons under drastically different circumstance - and both feel just as crappy 

It completely sucks when that "joy comes in the morning" saying turns out to be complete BS. 

The real kicker is that the people involved - the ones who stripped my life of trust, security and any smidgen of self-respect won't even think about me today. Or what happened. Or what continues to happen for me every single day. Trauma is the gift that keeps on giving, and those responsible get to play on in their Disneylandish existence with no consequence. 

I try to remember that vengeance is the Lord's, and one day He will smack down his wrath. Hard. But then I remember that I am a sinner too, and am in an equal amount of hot water with the Lord Almighty, and my revenge dreams aren't so fun anymore. 

There are things in my life I just can't get back. But, on the bright side, there are things that no one can take away. Let's focus on those things. God's total, unconditional love. The incredible opportunity to raise two amazing little people who seem to be second to Christ in their capability to love regardless of circumstance. The perfect song coming on the radio at the perfect time, when you have just enough minutes left on your drive to listen to it. Dance. Bubble baths. Unlikely conversations with strangers and the choice (and it's always there, even when it's hard to see) to be kind. 

And pie a la mode.

Have you ever thought about what those words really mean? Sure, we know it as ice cream on top of pie. But dig deeper. It means we get to have TWO desserts - ice cream AND pie, without being judged. It's 100% acceptable to have both, please. If you were to have a slice of cake and pie - glutton. Cheesecake and a sundae? Disgusting. Ice cream on a warm piece of peach pie - get a glimpse of heaven, people. 

June 4 can be okay after all. I guess. As long as there's pie.