I am not a crafter. I've lied to myself for years that I am. I have cooked/baked many of my Pinterest pins and have been pretty successsul. But I've also done many of my pinned crafts and have come in just under the number of offenses worthy of a spot on one of those mock/fail websites.
So for day 1 of 40 Bags in 40 Days, I purged my "craft closet," aka Frank's hallway nemesis. He hated the craft closet! I don't really understand why anyone wouldn't appreciate a fortress of gift wrap, glitter tubes and rolls of tulle around the bath towels and spare toilet paper, but to each their own, I suppose.
Since today is Thursday, I had my mini me apprenticing in the organization effort and she was over the moon. Charlotte is all about the crafting right now, and at 3-and-a-half, she is better than me in a lot of areas. So when she saw me tossing silk flowers, rubber stamps and bubble wrap out into the hallway floor, she whooped with glee.
"Mama! We can do CRAFTS!"
No. No we can't. The point of this purge is to un-craft the craft closet. How could I get her to understand that after an illustrious career of mediocre handmade gift giving, I was now about to bask in my retirement?
We did end up stamping some papers and she made some felt flower vases for the faux daisies and poppies, but then it was all about the bubble wrap and I was free to finish.
Goodbye to:
Fabric paint
Seasonal nic nacs I obsess over at Hobby Lobby and then never use.
Gold vellum. (No clue).
Yarn. (Do I knit? No. Have I ever knit? No.)
Air drying modeling clay. (Sam and I thought one summer afternoon that we could sculpt....)
Zebra print ribbon (Admittedly, this one hurt a little.)
Scrapbook paper (I tend to never forget any memory or experience EVER, so let's just save some trees...)
Stickers (Because everyone's long since potty trained wahoo!)
Glitter (I kept the pink glitter. So sue me.)
Jewelry cord (Because I decided to be a craft fair jeweler??? Sometimes I go to Hobby Lobby BEFORE picking up my meds refill down the street....)
Our old vacuum (bonus points?)
Charlotte immersed herself in doodad heaven while I cleaned, and we sold the vacuum and a whole lot of the craft supplies.
Made $30 and the closet is CLEAN!
I kept enough craft stuff to keep Charlotte entertained this summer while not holding onto enough to re-delude myself into believing my first name is really Martha.
I also reflected upon my life and my journey a bit, as I've committed to make these 40 days of decrapifying a growth process. (As deep as one can go after using the term "decrapify", that is.)
God showed me how long I've spent trying to create myself into something I'm not. People tend to have two very distinct views of me:
- cheerful, strong, leader savvy
- dramatic, negative, damaging
I'm not sure which one IS the real me - I suppose they both are, depending upon the situation. But one thing is for certain - I spend a lot of time worrying about who I am, how I look to others and creating a shadow of myself that everyone will love and accept.
How much have I missed out on experiencing the true, unabandoned fullness of Christ's love (as well as sharing that with others) by obsessing over what I can make myself appear as?
I suck at crafting. And I'm finding that the more I fall into the secure embrace of Jesus, the more I suck at holding onto the power to create what I think my life should be or how my heart should feel.
Happy clean closet day to you and yours.
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