It's the day that happens the day after that final curtain, when the show is over, we walk away from a process that has been a huge part of our life for 4 months, and it is bittersweet knowing that it's asking too much to ever have that exact same group of people in a room together again. Most will stay on for the next show, some will leave due to other commitments, a few will just drift away. It will never be exactly the same. And perhaps that's a good thing - because then the time you spend together belongs to God - it stands out in your mind as a memorable, special thing you can't control the time frame on, and it should be cherished.
The day after for me usually involves loafing around the house in comfy clothes, writing thank you notes, responding to various ministry inquiries and just hanging out with my family - especially the kids who have rarely seen all four of us in the same room in quite some time (thank you MLK day for that gift!)
For Sam, we go into a one-week detox - no show music allowed in common areas, a concerted effort to focus on other things like board games, reading, resting - NOT going to the studio with mommy to tie up loose ends. And we usually deal with irritated eyes, dry skin, nosebleeds, etc. from the theater air and dust that just messes him up. We also talk about going back to Kindergarten and not talking about the show. To not have a "look at me" attitude. To hear what went on in THEIR lives over the weekend, and if an urge to talk about being onstage comes up, to try talking about how Jesus met us there instead.
And wow, did Jesus ever meet us. You guys, I was not excited for this show. We had a stress-heavy cast. There were so many burdens in the lives of these participants - our purpose was genuinely tested and proven as we dealt with each one, unraveling and assisting in complicated situations with several individuals. Walking through storms with them, and walking through our own with a severe lack of funds and never enough hours in the week.
A few hours before opening night, when I was on my way to the theater, I lost my keys. I unlocked the car, buckled up the kids, ran back inside really quickly and could not find them. I had a complete mental breakdown, calling Frank hysterically, allowing the kids to see me hyperventilate and sob as I tore up the house and the car looking for them, and then finding them in a very obvious place. The stress and craziness that had been piling up on top of me since October just came pouring out at a very inopportune time. By the time I got to the theater, I was all cried out and reminded the devil he has no place in our ministry. At all. There isn't an inch of room available to him. He needed to leave.
The shows ended up going smoothly. Our audiences were generous and the cast was exceptionally strong despite everything thrown our way this season. This ended up being one of the best onstage casts we've ever had - they presented the message of the script loud and clear - I am seriously incredibly proud of them!
We also experienced incredible ministry backstage. Dedicated, real prayer for an injured dancer. Myself and another leader got the honor of catching the tears of some young participants who really stepped out and were real with themselves and what they were thinking/feeling. SUCH good work done in hearts this wknd!
So with this, I ask myself.....
Can I finally just trust God has got this?
Can I focus more on kindness and encouragement than I do on trying to do everything myself and failing?
In light of all we have to face in the next few months, can I just calm the heck down and trust God?
I totally can.
I love Him so much. He provides when things seem impossible. He doesn't provide the bare minimum - he gives an ABUNDANCE of good blessings to those who love Him. And this is a ministry that loves Him.
No one and nothing can ever take that away.
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