Getting Rid of Paul

There has been a fly in my car since Monday. We've named him Paul. 

Paul is the most annoying thing on earth. We are constantly tempting him with open windows shouting "Go away Paul! Get out of here!" And yet somehow he's bonded to us. 

I thought at first Paul was sticking around for the grape soda Sam spilled in he backseat, because really, what fly wouldn't? But I completely cleaned, shampooed and vacuumed my car yesterday morning and Paul is still with us. 

I've had approximately 50 close calls while driving, almost rear ending someone or not noticing a light change because I have become so obsessed with getting rid of Paul. Opening and shutting the windows, trying to freeze him out with the a/c, swatting at him, trying to crush him with my phone case....whenever I'm on the road, all attention goes to Paul. I hate him. He flies in my face, lands on my daughter and makes her scream, landed on top of my lip gloss....Paul has got to go.

And suddenly, uh oh....here comes one of those life metaphors. As Paul was perched on my steering wheel, (I've given up on freeing him and have decided we're just gonna have to starve him out), - I looked him in the eyes (figuratively, because he's fly sized) and told him, "Paul, you are my past! You are the enemy in my life! You are what's holding me back!" 

It probably wasn't fair of me to place so much blame on little Paul's shoulders -wings- whatever......but he really got me thinking.....

There is a constant presence in my life that I'm allowing. Despite all of the great, wonderful things God has provided me, I can't help but focus on this mundane nuisance from years past. It distracts me, constantly grabs at my attention and continuously almost lands me in relational wrecks because I'm letting it have so much power over me. It's like I can't enjoy life with it around, but I don't know how to make it go away so I have given up and befriended it. I hate it, but at least I know what to expect from it. 

There are a lot of great things trying to get into my heart, but all the doors and windows are closed up tightly. I'm the only one who can let them in - God has given me that choice. The greatest people I know can't do it for me. 

This week I will be focusing strongly on the Pauls in my life that aim to last much longer than my little insect co-pilot. I will be focusing strongly on showing them a way out and away from my heart. 

I'm on a great road - I don't want to veer, wreck, or turn back.